Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Nipple Confusion

What is it? My son has it… but I joke that he’s not confused. He’s very aware (and obvious) about his preferences. Here’s the breakdown:

If it's plastic, and breastmilk comes out of it - he's interested. (Bottle)
If it's plastic and milk doesn't come out of it, he's not interested. (Pacifier)
If it's got an epidermis and milk comes out of it, he's not interested. (Boob)
If it's got an epidermis, and milk doesn't come out of it, he's interested. (Fingers)

Is that odd?

And yes, I did say "breastmilk" out of the bottle. I am so sold (brainwashed?!?!) on the benefits of breastmilk, I pump 40 - 50 ounces a day so my little one doesn't miss out on the antibodies, etc. So that pretty much means, that before we even calculate in feeding, I've got about 4 hours a day dedicated to pumping alone... (That's half a work-day at the office!!!)

In true Sabrena fashion, I couldn’t just let the nursing thing go . Yeah, apparently it’s not enough that my kid’s getting breast milk exclusively… I have apparently bought into the LeLeche Leaguers (LLL) mantra that if it’s not from the boob it’s not as good for the child (ouch!). Um, it’s hard feeling guilt about EVERYTHING!?!?!

I was getting so worked up about being rejected by my guy (or for him to prefer plastic to me… PLASTIC?!?! SYNTHETIC?!?! I am obviously not raising a green baby. Doesn’t Holden know nursing is best for the environment?)

So this past week, I’ve been on the phone with the Triple-L’s national hot line, used the SNS nursing system (Holden is NOT a fan), fed him with a spoon (it only took an hour to eat 3.5 ounces and I swear an ounce of it ended up on his bib!), cried, prayed, cried some more… and then by divine intervention, my mother-in-love hooked me up with a copy of “On Becoming Babywise.”

I’m not going to give away the secret to “Babywise,” I’m sure that some of you are already familiar (and I can see how in this day and age how controversial this school of thought could be)… but I will say, that by the simple switch of giving Holden a little more structure time-wise, he latched on three separate sessions today – which is HUGE because yesterday he would literally turn away and purse his lips together when I’d “offer” the goods to him. (He obviously never got the memo about how infamous “the twins” were in Junior High…I was a very early bloomer.)

I still gave him a bottle afterwards because it was more of an apperatif than an actual feeding…

The LLLeaguer told me to be patient and just keep trying... which I've never believed in the word "try." I'm like Yoda, there's no try... only do or do not, right? But I'm committed to a breastmilk-fed baby... Holden just doesn't seem as committed to feeding from the breast.

Which reminds me, it's time to pump....again.

9 comments:

Erin said...

So hard Sabrena. But I'm absolutely certain that your persistence will pay off. I'm glad that the Babywise thing is showing some potential. Holden is his own little person already, isn't he? Ha! I'm a fan of this little guy. As always, your writing made me laugh out loud. You are great and I adore you.

Erin said...

P.S. Let go of the guilt! You are amazing! Look at what you do every day for your babe! Easier said than done, but still.

Cicely said...

I too have nipple confusion. I am confused why my nipples are so saggy.

Ha.

I am so freaking hilarious.

ps. David didn't think it was funny.

Staci said...

You are doing an amazing job..don't feel guilty at all. You are doing the best you can! I pumped for 3 months before I went back to worked and it worked perfectly. I traveled so much on my leave and it seemed much easier to have him drink from a bottle anyway then popping out my boob everywhere I went. Aslong as he is getting the nutriants from the breast milk..it doesn't matter how he gets it! I think the only difference is the whole bonding thing between a child and a mother when you breast feed but there are many ways of making that up to him! Keep doing what your doing..your amazing!

Alicia said...

Sabrena, you are amazing. I am just lucky that Brady latched on and liked it because I loathed pumping. I am in awe that you pump 50 oz/day. That is inspiring. Seriously.

corinne said...

sabrena, i hated pumping and eventually my baby refused the bottle anyway, so he is strictly a boob nurser. this was awesome at first but now sometimes i would like to be able to sneak away every once in a while but i can't leave my boobs behind. the bottle will give you some freedom! not that it makes it any easier, but there can be some upsides!

Sabrena Suite-Mangum said...

C-
I need your email because I still haven't been "invited" to your fancy-schmancy blog... which is a tragedy seeing as how we were locker buddies in High School and all. ;)

Can you send me an invite? ssuitemangum@gmail.com?

Bree said...

STAY STRONG! It's hard for everybody! If you haven't already tried..you could try the Nipple Shield made by Modelo (purchased at target)...my sister and others swear by them!
and p.s. the guilt doesn't ever go away-it just shows up in different forms! :) thinking about you!

WIKKY said...

you can do it. It took forever for Josh to latch on but when he finally did, he NEVER looked back. Ha. You are awesome and even if it doesn't work out, you are STILL and WILL always be an amazing mama!